Came across this little passage the other day.
“They say one sees who one’s friends in times of trouble. But I say one sees them in good times.
If a man really is your friend, he will be pleased by your good fortune without reservations.
But if he is not really your friend, every step forward will be for him a reproach or even an insult, the worm of envy will enter his heart and gnaw at it.”
After going through it a couple of times I slowly shifted my perspective.
As someone who’s lost most of my friends and even the comfort of family I always wonder how I got to this point without changing my core self.
It’s always easy to think that people desert you during the darkest times but really when you think about it. How many people genuinely stick around during a major success or purple patch.
I’m a business person. I’ve barely scratched the surface of who I want to be or what I want to achieve.
For the first year or so because I didn’t drive or have anything solid to show for my toil relationships were relatively the same.
When the fruits of that labour started to show a bit of promise with a car and upgrade of staff and premises the people started to disappear one by one. You would get a mere tongue in cheek compliment and never hear from them again.
Business world is fickle though. Appearances of success aren’t really success. Half the time you’re trying to stay afloat but people don’t see this.
Being an emotionally draining discipline. You need the support of people you love and trust but unfortunately these are the first to disappear.
You will look for encouragement but you will not find it.
It’s a lonely road. I deal with so much stress daily and finding someone who can actually understand what you’re going through is almost impossible.
Being an introverted only child I do handle difficult issues well by myself but I do always appreciate the real people around me.
Honorable mention to my cousin and friend Munya. He’s always there for me through the good times and bad times.
When I opened my first business he brought his wife over to see what I had achieved. He was helping out with the hard labour for my first major service contract yet he’s a medical doctor.
When I opened a bar he was around showing love. A few weeks ago I was in a major fix and he was there to bail me out.
He’s been a constant through the good times and bad times and I appreciate that.
Unfortunately he’s probably the only one left.
One of my day one buddies from high school didn’t even invite me to his wedding but that’s life.
Going forward I’ll observe who’s genuinely happy during the good times and keep them close.
To live is to fight, for this world is but a hurricane of challenges all aimed at you.